Ruben Journey to Life

  I see it is not enough to say 'what I want' as a World that is Best for All, I have to walk it. I am listening to the Reptilians Interviews in EQAFE, suggest to listen with. I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to not stop. I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to want the world to change, instead of changing myself. I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to not see, realise and understand that unless I stop I cannot possibly want the world to stop. I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to pay lip service to world change. I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to not see that unless I change nothing will change for me. I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to drive myself to the edge of my destruction instead of building myself in every breath. I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to want to paint a pretty picture of myself, instead of facing my...

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to have back doors I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to believe that I have other 'ways out' other than walk within principle no matter what I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to not see that 'other ways' that are not Best for All are simply abuse I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to not see, realize and understand that I will only eat shit if I have back doors I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to believe that standing up is an 'option' I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to not stand up for myself in every single breath I forgive myself that I have not accepted and allowed myself to see that I am my own sentencer through what I do  I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to believe I am not enough to stand up for myself I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to...

  I forgive myself that I have acepted and allowed myself to not be here as breath in every moment of breath I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to believe I am alone I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to not see that my father is always with me I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to not see that I can seize the opportunity to stand up in every moment of breath I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to not see, realize and understand that I can stop myself from falling I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to not see that 'falling' is an excuse to not stand up/ postpone standing up I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to victimize myself when I fall instead of seeing, realizing and understanding that all fall is Self-fall I forgive myself that I have not accepted and allowed myself to see that I am responsible for All I do and say I forgive myself that I have...

  Changing my starting point of participation in this world, from wanting to have as many 'pleasurable' experiences as I can to instead utilize my participation to grow, expand and change, utilizing my experience to discover myself, purify myself as I correct my mind and my living to what is Best for All I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to participate in life with the starting point of consumerism 'feel good' - wanting to accumulate good experiences instead of principled living I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to distract myself with hedonism and self interest I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to distract myself with addictions I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to timeloop in my addictions such as porn I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to not see, realise and understand the gravity of the situation where every day I don't stand up for myself is a day ...