Day 24: Am I a Slave?

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to participate in a reaction to everything

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to compare myself to everyone else

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to not see, realise and understand that everyone has a path and it is not about comparing

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to believe I would be happier if I had wife and kids

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to want to have a 'normal life' 

I forgive myself that I have not accepted and allowed myself to see, realize and understand that I don't have to compare myself to anyone else

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to not see, realise and understand that 'not wanting to do anything' is a reaction and not who I really am

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to participate in apathy

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to be 'tired of everything'

I forgive myself that I have not accepted and allowed myself to see it is the mind that is bored and not me

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to not see the relation between leaving all addictions and being bored - which is the mind telling me it wants energy

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to not see that the mind will want energy at all times and thus why I react bored to stopping all addictions

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to not see, realise and understand that my mind 'can go on a strike' but it is because it needs energy and not myself

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to not see, realise and understand that who I am does not need energy to survive

I forgive myself that I have not accepted and allowed myself to see that there would be different reactions to stopping all addictions - and thus I have to be prepared for everything

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to not see, realise and understand that there can be some withdrawals when stopping all addiction =

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to not see the 'coincidence' that I am reactive exactly when I have stopped every addiciton

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myselft to not see that by staying sober I have to be proud of myself 

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to not see that even if I perceive that I haven't done anything, if I stay sober, it is doing something

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to not see, realise and understand that it is an achievement merely not falling for ex addictions

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to expect a lot from myself instead of being ok with breathing 

I commit myself to walk steadfast no matter the feeling

I commit myself to remind myself that even when I don't do much I am doing by not falling for addictions

I commit myself to remind myself to be proud of myself for not falling for addictions