Day 10: First Blockade

 

I've been without writing for close to five days, which was not in the plans, I am back.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to let myself not write

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to not see that I can do the physical act of writing once a day no matter what

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to give up on myself

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to not see, realise and understand that it is impossible to give up on oneself

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to make it difficult for myself by not writing

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to not write

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to not see, realise and understand that unless I stand up for myself no one will

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to lose faith in myself

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to give up on writing

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to not see, realise and understand that I can write every day

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to go back to old patterns

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to 'hype myself up' instead of walking steadfast every day

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to not see that once I start writing then I can do it 

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to fall for my resistances

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to not see that I have to get back to self forgiveness whenever I deviate from the path/go into self sabotage

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to go into self sabotage

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to want to take drugs

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to take drugs

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to not see, realize and understand that walking the main path is easy - as stated by Lao Tzu

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to not see that if I let a desire fester I can end up doing what I desire

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to do drugs in the past

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to not see, realise and understand that I am more than my desires

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to not see that I am more than my addictions